Friday, 13th May 2022, 05:30pm Church hall
Event Status: PastBible Study Report – Held on Friday, 13th May 2022 in the Hall
Attendees
- Martin Muthee
- Monica Muthee
- Victor Kariuki
- Josephine Kariuki
- Benson Chege
- Silas Kalonzo
- Catherine Kalonzo
- Cecily Mwangi
- Fred Barasa
Apologies
- William Mbuthia
- Martha Mbuthia
- Sam Gichuhi
- Cate Gichuhi
- Pius Gitonga
- Nancy Gitonga
- Agatha Barasa
Boundaries of Intimacy
Question:
What are some of the things we should limit from the other party in each of the following boundaries? Why?
Relatives’ boundary (to keep the relatives at a reasonable distance)
- Limit the updates of your family’s happenings to them. That is, do not inform them about the daily happenings in the house. It may create an opportunity for intrusion.
- Strive not to live with your relatives. Be it siblings or cousins or any other relatives, find a way to support them without living in the same house. You may have to accommodate them briefly as they seek a place, but should not be for long. You would rather rent a small house for them. They may end up knowing your weaknesses, report them to your parents, and even drive wedges between you two.
- Reduce the frequency of their visitations. Relatives should not be allowed to visit very frequently because they may pick up happenings that may be adverse to your relationship. Consult each other to know how best to achieve this without hurting the other.
- Be autonomous in your decision-making. Do not rely on your parents or any other relatives to help you make decisions about the home. The two of you have now left your parents and become one, so you should decide and act as one, independent of your parents’ overinfluence.
- Be careful about doing business with family. Unless it is very professionally done (family business like law firms, supermarkets etc), it may easily strain relations between you and the relatives.
Additions…
- None of the points is cast on stone. We may still find ourselves engaging in the same, but the fellowship gave many examples that suggest that we should all try to maintain the above boundaries.
- Be a good ambassador of your partner to your relatives. How you present him/her there is the way they’ll always know him/her.
Next meetup
Couple’s evening coffee on Friday, 20th May 2022 from 5:30 – 7:00 pm. The venue will be announced.